Man, I have been so convicted of something. I have to talk about it or I think that my head might pop off. Before I say this, please know that I never intended to be a "blogger" who put there opinions or struggles out there on the net... but I am turning into to one of them. Also, please let me say that in saying what I am about to say, I am admitting a problem that I have been having and I am making myself pretty vunerable to even put it out there. I am pretty ashamed of my behavior.

Ok, all that said. Hmmmm.... I am pretty nervous to admit to this BUT I have a real problem with tabloid magazines and gossip. I really don't know why I care that Angelina Jolie is pregnant or what Britney Spears is up too, BUT for some reason I do. I know it must sound kinda silly, and let me explain, it is not like I am reading the National Enquirer or Star Magazine. But I have developed an unhealthy habit of visiting gossip websites THROUGH OUT THE DAY!! Ugghhh... Not just once a day but literally through out the day. It is kinda pathethic. I tell myself that I am going to see what the latest fashion trends are or a cute new hair style but in all honesty I am going to devour the lives of these people that I don't even know.

I have gone through this in my mind front to back. One part of me (the sick part) says that these people open themselves up to the scrutiny, so they are kinda like a human zoo. They have agreed to live in a situation where they live "in the public eye". I have managed to stop having compassion for them because I WAS of a mind set that they asked for it and that was that. But I am feeling pretty diferently about it know. I realize that they are people who want to pursue there passions and talents and that it really is none of my business what they are up too.

I went and saw Beth Moore this past weekend in San Diego and she talked about something that has hit a real nerve. In the Bible in Genesis chapter 2:16, God said that man must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat it you will surely die. Well, tabloids and gossip are like the tree of knowledge of good and evil. I have no business to know what Britney Spears is doing with her life and the more I eat from that tree to closer she and I get to death. It happened with Princess Diana and even Anna Nicole Smith. I really do believe that they were driven into the ground by the world's (and my) unhealthy desire to know about their lives. And that isn't even mentioning the poisoning effect the information has in my life. It certainly does not benefit me or my family. It doesn't make me a better Wife or Mom to know what Jen Anniston is up too or if Tara Reid has been on another binger.

So, I am going to try to stop. Not just by my own strength because then I would surely fail. But I am giving this up to God and asking for him to give me the strength to be done with it. I have heard it say that if you can do something for 21 days, it becomes a habit. So over the next 21 days and beyond, I am going to surrender this to God and try my best to Just Say No.

Wow, that was hard to say. I hope that you will hold me accountable in love.

Clean--Day One!

Ok--I feel the need to put a picture up...