but then I realize that what I am so excited for is this moment! Today! Spring!

While Travis was deployed I reached some of my darkest days. I was exhausted, depleted, stressed, worried and pretty grumpy. His deployment was one of the hardest things I have ever gone thru. All while trying to keep a happy face on. In front of the kids and in front of the everyone else watching. I tried but every day felt like a long and grueling marathon. Day after day, weekend after weekend, load of laundry after load of laundry, meal after meal, diaper after diaper. I can honestly say that I only pulled thru because I knew God had a plan and I believed He was shaping our family. And, some dear friends who let me lean on them, carried me the rest of the way. 192 days of being a single Mom was enough for me!

One Sunday morning (about half-way-thru) I went to church, to meet with my Sunday school group and one of my friends read a passage from a book that he was enjoying. I was dizzy with trying to get packed for church, get the kids in their Sunday school classes and trying to remember to breathe. The only words I heard read were, "Like spring after winter." I don't know who wrote the book or what it was called, what I do know- was in that moment I hungered for those words to describe my life. I yearned for the days when the deployment became a memory and not my current status on Facebook. Those words rung in my ears {like Spring after Winter} and became a goal. I wanted a spring after my personal winter. I choked down the tears that day and set my heart on those words. I didn't really know if I would be able to make it but I definitely hoped....